Struggling With A Naysayer

Don’t you just love it when you share your tender dream with someone and they immediately catch your enthusiasm for it? They might even pat you on the back and encourage you to go for it, guns ablaze. These are the best kind of people! They are for keeps.

But there is also a breed of people who will throw a wet blanket on your dreams without a second thought.

These people stand ready with ‘helpful advice’ about why you are destined to fail if you pursue your dream: it’s hard to get published; you can’t make money doing that; you are not qualified enough; you are going through a phase.

Sounds like a naysayer! And if you listen to a naysayer long enough, you will start to believe that maybe you are crazy for wanting a life that’s less than ordinary.

So how do you stop a naysayer from extinguishing your life-dreams?

Here is what works for me:

1. Shield your dreams

Your dreams and aspirations are sacred; be mindful who you share them with. In her book “The Secret Door To Success,” Prosperity Teacher, Florence Scovel Shinn, writes that talking too much about your affairs scatters your forces and brings you up against a high wall. I take this to mean talking about our dreams opens the door to other people’s doubts and scepticism.

Think about it - once you get someone else's opinions in the mix of your creation, not only do you have your own expectations and beliefs to manage, you now have the added task of managing their stuff as well.

So it's worth being very deliberate about who you bring into the mix of your creation.

2. Tune them out

Everyone gets to choose whatever they want to believe, and just because a naysayer says or believes something doesn't mean you have to believe it too. Don’t get defensive, don’t argue your point, don’t try to sway them to your side. Just switch them off and build confidence in your plans. Live and let live!

My favorite 'watch me, I'm gonna to do it anyway' affirmation comes in the form of Eminem's Not Afraid song.

3. Hang out with a cheer squad

Align yourself with people who are supportive and see potential in you. By the same token, seek to inspire possibility and empowerment in others, and break out into a victory dance for their every win.

Use these affirmations to attract ideal people and relationships:

  • My friends and I encourage each other’s growth and success.
  • I only attract people who love and support me.

4. Have faith in your goals

Before anyone else in the world believes in your dream, you have to believe in it. Believe that something good can happen, and then focus your heart, creativity and energy into bringing it to life. Do this above all else and you are going to hit a home run.

To amp up your belief that your treasure is within reach, ask yourself these questions:

  • What is my heart's true desire? - This is your chance to get clear on what YOU want, not what you think is possible or what others want for you. What do you really want?
  • Why do I want it? - We want the things we want because we believe having them is going to make us feel good. Whether that good feeling is success, joy, satisfaction, relief, etc., start engaging it now and your dream will not seem so foreign and unachievable.
  • Why do I believe I can have it? - Maybe you know someone who has achieved a similar goal, look at your past successes and accomplishments, your skills, etc. 

5. Be your #1 fan

We are such sublime creatures you and I, and we deserve the very best that life has to offer - unlimited abundance in whatever shape or form we desire. Trust in yourself and in your worthiness, then nothing anyone says will sway you off your path to success. The best way to cultivate this sense of worth and self-belief is by practicing LOTS of self-love and self-acceptance.

Seriously, the system is set up for your success; choose to believe you can succeed and hold onto that thought no matter what the outer circumstances and opinions of others.

You get to write how your story ends, not the naysayers.

Hey, The Beatles were told they had “no future in show business,” whilst only five people turned up to see the Wright brothers’ first flight in their “heavier-than-air machine.”

Go forth and birth your dream into the world, we will be cheering you on.


* Loago Madigele is a Law of Attraction coach based in Melbourne, Australia with a background in financial investing (former Certified Financial Analyst, Senior Equity Analyst) who uses Theta Healing in conjunction with Law of Attraction to give clients a unique perspective in creating their dream job and succeed in their careers.. She is the creator of the Manifest Your Dream Job program and The Magic Manifesting Journal.